Studio711.com – Ben Martens

You Can’t Screw It Up

payrollchecksThe other day at work we were talking about our biggest mistakes in a work environment. It reminded me of an epic failure at my first computer job…

My Dad was a contracter and his boss (the owner) got me a job during high school at a company that processes payroll for thousands of companies across the United States. I worked in the computer room processing the jobs. We had big laser printers that would print 150 checks per minute and it kept you pretty busy just feeding it paper, not to mention pulling 12 sheets out of it whenever it jammed or pouring a gallon of toner into it. it took a while to get the hang of it, but after a while it was fairly mechanical. I enjoyed the job though because the people were fun and sometimes I’d flip through the checks and hold one worth a million dollars. If I had changed my name to “Illinois Department of Revenue”, do you think I could have cashed it?

When I started learning the old mainframe system that ran the whole operation, I specifically remember hearing them say “Don’t worry, you can’t really screw anything up.” Challenge accepted.

The computer system had a bunch of “partitions” and each one could run an individual payroll job. One of our main tasks was to look at all the incoming requests and figure out how to organize them to get maximum throughput through the system. If I remember correctly, there was a background partition and then eight job partitions. The background partition was how you interacted with the system and submitted jobs to the either other partitions. When things went wrong with a job, you’d pause a partition by typing “P F3” where 3 is the number of the partition running the job.

On some very busy days, we’d squeeze a little more juice out of the system by running jobs in the background partition. It was a little risky because it would block user interactions while it was running, but if you had a really quick, high priority job to get through, it wasn’t a huge deal.

It was one of those busy days and I had submitted a job to the background partition. There was a mistake so to stop it from getting worse, I quickly typed “P BG”. Those characters will always be burned into my brain because basically it felt like when I hit Enter, the entire building ground to a halt. I had just paused the partition that the computer was using to listen to input from the users. So effectively the computer was happily chugging along with it’s ears plugged and there was no way to tell it to start listening again because it wasn’t listening to us.

Oops.

We all just kind of stared at each other with this “uh oh” look on our faces. People around the building started coming to the window of the computer room with quizzical looks on their faces. The president and the mainframe guru came storming in. I made myself tiny in the corner. It was a doozy of a problem. They were on the phone with IBM for THREE HOURS trying to figure out how to fix it. I still don’t know what they did but eventually it came back online and somehow I got a pass because I was the stupid intern.

So please, don’t tell me that I can’t do anything bad that you haven’t done before. I have a knack for it. Maybe that’s why I ended up geting a job as a tester for 8 years.

What Is Lent?

season-of-lentThis is the next installment of my “What does that religious celebration mean?” series. The first was Advent. We made it through Christmas. I forgot to write about Epiphany and now we’re onto Lent. So what is Lent?

Lent covers the six weeks before Easter and kicks off with Ash Wednesday. Many churches will have extra Wednesday night services so you end up going to church twice each week. The extra services are there to giive you even more time to reflect on the meaning of Lent. The whole point is to show us our need for a Savior and what’s about to happen at the end of Lent (Jesus’s death and His resurrection at Easter.) Lent reminds us WHY Jesus had to come to suffer, die and rise again. He did all that because we are sinners. The law that God sets forth in the Bible is very clear. He demands 100% aboslute perfection. If you can pull that off, you get into heaven. But as you probably guessed, that’s impossible .From the moment we are conceived, we’re sinful. If that’s all we covered in Lent services, it would be extremely depressing because we’d leave knowing that we’re heading straight to hell when we die. But the story doesn’t end there. After each reminder of our failures, we are presented with the reminder that Jesus came to pay the penalty for sin in our place. Through him, we are guaranteed spots in heaven and all that’s required is faith.

You may have heard people talk about Lent in terms of giving something up for the season. The idea has lost a lot of its good intentions. Many people now do it because they think they’re going to gain points with God if they choose to not eat Skittles or drink coffee during Lent. Nope. But giving up something for Lent can be a good thing if you use it as a constant daily reminder of the meaning behind the season for Lent.

So if you step into a Lent service, it might seem like a somber occasion. There’s black on the altar and there’s a lot of talk about all the suffering that Jesus had to endure because we are screwups. But stay for the end and you’ll hear the wonderful message of what that Jesus’s death and resurrection mean for us if we believe. We get eternal life in heaven. It’s the ultimate gift.

Great Wolf Lodge Trip

greatwolf2016_1Great Wolf Lodge is an indoor water park a little less than two hours south of our house. It’s a national chain so if this post sounds interesting to you, check their site to see where the closest one is to you. Tyla and I have always thought it looked interesting as we drove by, but a quick check of the website proves that you’ll be a creeper if you show up without kids. So we basically had Elijah as an excuse to go to the water park.

Our trip was Monday through Wednesday because we found a deal for 40% off. Your waterpark pass starts at 1pm on the day of arrival and ends at 9pm on the day of your departure. You could get a LOT of waterpark time for just a one night stay. Checkout time is 11am but they have lockers and restrooms where you can easily shower and change even if you don’t have a room anymore.

We arrived pretty late on Monday night so we skipped the water park and took Elijah down to story time. They have a big animatronic setup where they tell some story about blah blah blah Mother Nature blah blah. Elijah’s favorite part of every story time was at the end when one of the Great Wolf Lodge wolf characters would come out to read a story.

The rooms are HUGE. I don’t know if they are all like this, but ours was near the conference center on the second floor just down from the water park entrance. The ceilings were probably 11-12 feet high and there was more square footage than most other hotel rooms that I’ve been in. It’s nothing super fancy but it’s nice and there’s a pretty big mini fridge there to keep your food cool.

If you’re looking to save money, the fridge is a key part of it. Everything there costs money except the room and waterpark. We had to walk past four money spending opportunities in the ~100 steps from our room to the water park entrance. If your kids don’t know the meaning of the word “no”, prepare for a big bill. Thankfully, ours was happy playing in the arcade without realizing that he wasn’t acutally playing anything.

The waterpark is impressive. There’s a large wave pool, a swimming area with basketball hoops, a big “fort” with a 1000 gallon bucket that dumps every few minutes and two waterslides, a large toddler play area with two tiny slides and then four “big kid” slides. It’s a big place, but I was actually surprised that it wasn’t bigger. The Lynnwood Aquatic Center is somewhat similar and isn’t that much smaller than Great Wolf Lodge. That being said, it was plenty big for a toddler. Tyla and I had fun on the various slides while we took turns watching Elijah.

There are tons of activities for kids (all of which you pay for.) The coolest one is probably MagiQuest. Participants get a magic wand and then walk around the lodge pointing at stuff on the walls and on pedestals. The art/animals/pedestals react to the wand helping guide the player along a quest for points and prizes. I’m excited to give that a try when Elijah is old enough to understand it. Other activities include a spa for adults, a spa for kids, arcade, and mini golf. There’s a breakfast buffet ($15/adult, $7/child) and burger/steak/chicken dinner place that looked to be about $20/person unless you ordered the steak. Our general practice on vacations is to pack our own breakfast and lunch for the room and then eat out for dinner. We chose a Mexican place in nearby Centralia, but unfortunately it was closed so we just chose a random place that was close by.

Will we go back? Yep! It was fun and I could see it being a great vacation once Elijah is old enough to run around on his own. Everyone gets their own waterproof bracelet that acts as your door key and credit card during your stay. It’s super convenient because you never have to worry about taking anything with you to the waterpark. Elijah could just run around and do whatever he wanted while we relaxed. It would be especially great if he brought a friend or two with him. We’d definitely look for another deal though. Full price is about $200/night plus about $35/night in taxes and fees. I’m glad we gave it a shot! Thanks to Tyla for doing most of the planning on this one!

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Conflicting Opinions

In a recent post, I mentioned the Smarter Every Day interview with the President. Destin, the guy behind Smarter Every Day, has posted another video talking about the whole experience. Why was he picked? How did disagreeing on some political issues effect the conversation?

Around the 3:42 mark, Destin goes into some really interesting thoughts about how polarized our political environment is. He compares it to feedback loops. There are positive feedback loops and negative feedback loops. If a system has both inputs, it will trend toward the norm. But if you remove one, you are going to wildly diverge. This is what happens with politics if we only listen to news/media/journalists who agree with us. You’re not getting both sides so you end up very polarized one way or the other. Destin points out that it’s our responsibility to really be informed about the issues and understand the other side of the argument.

If you were at all intrigued by my previous post, watch this video. He says it better than I did with some cool graphics and stats to back it up.

Justified

justifieddrawThis one is a quickie but if you’re in the market for a new TV show to fill your screen, give Justified a shot. Ken and Logan recommended it to me and I’m sucked in. It really kicks into high gear toward the end of the first season and in the second season. I don’t know how it ends but I’ll know before too much longer.

If you’re a fan of Cordkillers, note that they have started covering the show in their “Spoilerin’ Time” episodes.

My new method of watching TV shows is to wait until they’re over, find them on Amazone Prime Instant Video or Netflix and then binge watch them. It’s a lot nicer than recording them all on TV and waiting for them to be doled out one by one.

Buying Jeans

leviamazonI’m not a big fan of shopping for clothes. Usually I hold out as long as possible and then let Tyla drag me to a store where I try to get it all over with as quickly as possible. Part of the problem is that I’m about equal height to your average ogre.

For example, here’s how I buy jeans: Walk into the store and immediately start going through all of the piles looking to see if anything is my size. After I’ve found the three pairs in the entire store that could fit me, I try them on and hopefully buy one or two.

But now I’ve discovered how to get out of shopping trips AND find jeans that fit better: AMAZON! It seems so obvious I wonder why I’ve never thought of it before. I looked through my pile of jeans and figured out which styles of Levis I generally buy and found the corresponding product page on Amazon. From there I chose my size and then chose from about a dozen different colors. A couple days later, they showed up at my door. Brililant.

Goals For Summer

snoopyspringfeverIt’s only the beginning of February but we’re already starting to get some warmer days. The lawn is waking up, plants are starting to grow, and people are starting to catch spring fever. I’m loving the increasing daylight hours. This time of year is usually very cloudy so on those clear mornings I’m shocked at how early it gets bright. “Spring” lasts a very long time in the Pacific Northwest. It’s roughly now until June and then summer arrives with a bang around the Fourth of July. I’m looking forward to those long summer evenings where we can go out for walks after dinner before Elijah’s bedtime. I’m also hoping to make good use of the warm summer weather on some hikes with Elijah. I’ve already tried to get him out a couple times but the weather and our schedule haven’t aligned. There are so many fun things to see in the mountains and I’m hopeful that he’ll like hiking with me.

There’s no real point here, other than me looking forward to spring and spending time outside with my family. Bring on the sunshine!

Silverware Drawer Organizer

When we moved in, we bought some cheapo plastic silverware drawer organizers. They work ok, but they never really fit the drawers. I was looking for an excuse to use my new box joint jig and I decided the silverware drawer would be a good project.

I had walnut laying around and I wanted to use a nice hardwood for the box joints so this whole project got made out of walnut. It’s kind of ridiculous but it’s so much fun to work with walnut. I resawed it on the bandsaw and planed everything down to thickness. The Wixley digital planer gauge that I got for Christmas really worked nicely for the planing. I glued two pieces together to make the bottom, cut the box joints and then cut the dados for all the inserts.

My original plan was to glue it up but everything fit so nicely that I’m not going to glue the pieces in. This way we can easily remove them to clean the drawer out if we need to. I put on a bunch of coats of lacquer and then let it cure for a few days before sticking it in the drawer.

Is it overklil to have a solid walnut silverware drawer? Yep. But I love that everything fits so much nicer now and it was a good learning experience.

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Correlation vs Causation

criticalthinkingHow often have you seen a study which states “People who eat X have fewer occurrences of cancer”? If the study says that, the article usually says, or at least implies, that you should eat less X to lower your risk of cancer. Once you notice this pattern, you’ll see it EVERYWHERE. It’s a classic example of mistaking “correlation” for “causation”. Just because people who eat X get cancer less often does not mean that you can CAUSE yourself to have a lower risk of cancer by not eating X. It could be a multitude of other factors. Maybe people who don’t eat X also work out more, maybe they have less stress in their lives, or maybe it’s a combination of a dozen traits. I’m using the food thing as an example but it’s a popular mistake in articles about education, parenting and climate change too.

I often think about what it’s going to be like for Elijah to learn as he goes through school. He’ll have the entire knowledge of humanity at his fingertips. Learning facts is probably not as critical as it was when I was in school. But I think topics like correlation vs causation and recognizing those mistakes in texts will be much more important for him. He needs to be able to sift through the mountain of information to find actual facts that he can use.

I still don’t know how to teach him that skill, but knowing it’s a problem is half the battle, right? It’s probably a combination of logic, fact checking, basic statistics and a few other skills that I haven’t thought of yet. Hopefully I figure it out soon.

Skiing With Jay

Twelve years ago, Jay patiently taught me how to ski. I had gone a couple times in my life before that, but he took the time to really get me going. I still look like a drunken ogre awkwardly sliding down the mountain, but at least I can get down most slopes without falling and I can enjoy it. We’ve spent a LOT of time riding a lift together since then, but after I moved away in 2006, those chats got cut way down. This past weekend, he came out for a visit and we spent three straight days skiing. The difference between now and 12 years ago is, well, 12 years of aging. We’re not as young as we used to be and we were reminded of that with each run.

Jay’s original plan was to come ski Thursday through Saturday. That ended up getting changed to Saturday through Monday and it’s a good thing because it rained all the way to the top of the mountain on Thursday. On Friday night, it dumped snow and we had about 10″ of fresh snow on Saturday. We spent the day at Crystal and had a great time with some pretty good powder runs. Day 2 was also at Crystal, and even though there wasn’t any fresh snow, it had stayed cold since the previous one so it was still fluffy and fun. With Jay skiing beside me, I finally explored the Right Angle Trees run. It’s a very infrequently skied double black diamond area that I’m hesitant to explore without a partner. It took us a while to pick our way down the run but there was literally nobody else around. At one point we just plopped down on the side of the hill for five minutes and enjoyed the silence.

I always take Jay to Crystal when he comes because it’s my favorite ski hill, but I figured it would be fun to show him something else. We headed to Stevens Pass for our third day of skiing. This was a Monday so the crowd was very small. There were maybe a couple inches of fresh snow and we found a couple spots off the runs that were still deep and fresh for a few turns.

I owe big thank yous to Jay for flying all the way out here, and to Juliet and Tyla who watched our kids the whole weekend while we played. That’s a lot to ask and without them, this wouldn’t have happened.